Is Your Behavior Crass or Class?
by Alizah Afet
If I look back on all the dancers I studied with over the past 17 years, each stands out in my memory for what I learned and took away from my time with them. It may not have been their specialty, or even a dance move or technique, but each has left a unique impression on me and my dance.
I am infinitely grateful to my very first teacher, Naharin, for showing me what it is to be a real dance professional. She has high standards of behavior and presentation, and was (and is) a great example to new dancers. Naharin often took us out on "field trips" to shows and clubs, and of course we often attended her shows. She impressed upon us that, from the minute you walk into a venue, that you are "the dancer", and must always look and act the part. This meant dressing nicely - no jeans or sweats (my evening wardrobe quadrupled as a result!). You were always be polite to customers. The dancer was expected to participate - and often lead - the line dancing, whether it was a debke, tchamiko, or shuffle. It was from Naharin that I learned to always, ALWAYS have a coverup, a supply of diaper pins, and how to accept tips in my costume if the venue dictated that.
Some might think such things are old-fashioned now. I disagree. The implementation might change - for example, you wouldn't wear an evening gown to a club night now, even though dancers always did "back in the day". The essentials endure. Excellent technique, musicality, and feeling are the qualities of a great dancer. Comporting yourself with dignity and grace, and maintaining the aura and mystery of "the dancer" are qualities of a professional. And it is these qualities that will get you invited back to perform at restaurant venues and private gigs.
I'm seeing some pretty scary things out there these days. I hope that this reflects inexperience and ignorance, because then these can be fixed, through learning and exposure to good example. If I could wave a magic want and change anything, it would be these:
- Never, ever touch your tip money. I once saw a dancer bend over to pick up money that had fallen off of her costume. This is the biggest of no-no's. You never touch your money. Ideally, you have friends in the audience who will collect anything that falls from your costume, or, in the case of clubs where money is showered over your head (usually Arabic clubs), will collect your tips from the floor. I once saw LaReina, of Sacred Source Belly Dance, handle a tricky tip situation nicely. She was performing at the Middle East and had money showered over her head. LaReina is blessed with abundant, thick hair, and one lone dollar bill attached itself to the crown of her head and wouldn't come off. She leisurely took it off the top of her head, fanned herself with it, and then let it drop to the floor. This was a graceful and humorous way to deal with the situation.
- Look nice offstage. As mentioned above, you're not expected to wear evening gowns anymore (sadly). But for heaven's sake, at least make an attempt to look nice. Nice pants and top will do. But don't roll in looking like a tourist in jeans or shorts.
- Wear a coverup when in costume and not performing. It doesn't matter if you're "only" at a recital with your fellow students. It's distracting and inconsiderate of the dancer who is performing. People should be looking at her, not you. And a veil is not a coverup.
- Never take tips in your cleavage or the front center of your hip belt. Some venues like the dancer to go around to the tables for tips. However you may personally feel about this, the restaurants like it because it makes the customers feel special. And before you criticize, please keep in mind that all the great Boston clubs - Averof, Club Zara, the El Morocco - had this practice. But I digress. If you have to take money in your costume, present the side of your hip or your back shoulder strap. Never allow a customer to put money in your cleavage or near your Highly Personal Area (to use Hyetti's good phrase).
- Remember you are always visible, even when not performing. Once customers have seen you perform, they will remember and watch you offstage too, so think about how you are viewed and perceived. In the old days, you never smoked or drank. If a customer bought you a drink, you accepted it graciously, took a sip, and then didn't touch it again. Those days are gone (and smoking is not allowed in restaurants, thank goodness). But just know that you are "the dancer" that evening, and should behave accordingly. A good example: whenever I see Ayla at the Athenian Corner, not only does she dress nicely after her performance, but carries a pretty, sparkly fan to cool herself down.
Professional standards of behavior and etiquette never go out of style, and can only serve to reflect well on you as a professional dancer. Your offstage behavior carries as much of an impact on customers and employers as your onstage performance. Think about how you want to be noticed and known - as the dancer who picked up her tip money, or as the dancer who carries a pretty fan?